I'm back!

Ta da!  I'm back!  I have a new laptop, so this should be a whole lot easier than me trying to update from my phone with a yelling Claire in the background saying, "Play with Mommy's iPhone, please?"

So the Christmas trip went swimmingly! We flew down to Jacksonville on December 19th, and spent a few days with my parents.  Claire was very excited to see everyone - which is a vast improvement over her being terrified of my Dad's beard. I'd say that "Gammie," "Poppy," and "Uncle Sef" enjoyed their time with the munchkin and seemed pretty sad to see us go.  Uncle Seth got Claire a super cool Astronaut suit, which Claire was terrified of at first.  After we went to Nana Jan's house in North Palm Beach, though, she loved it! Grammie and Poppy got Claire a Kid Camera (VTech Kidzoom).  Talk about a hit!  We now have hundreds of pictures of blurry Claire legs.  She is in love!

So, the big hit with Daddy.  My mom got EVERYONE this helicopter that can be flown around - inside.  Bryce was seriously so amazed by it, he went out the next day (literally) and bought one for himself.  And broke it within hours.  (side note, we took it back and found out that the possession of the aircraft was user error - first on, last off when it comes to Remote Control).  But it wasn't too hard to fix - just a bruised ego and a $4 piece of plastic.

I gave my parents a new coffee table.  Or, at least, I tried.  It came in before we got there, and was damaged.  Not sealed properly, and gouges galore.  We got the company to make it good, and my parents got a new one delivered - it was screwed up, too.  So, total refund of monies, and I'm back in the coffee table hunt.  We will make this good, darn it!

We didn't get to see any friends in Gainesville this time around.  Audra was sick, Lorrie was not in town yet, and no one else was coming in until the weekend.  *insert sad face here*

We drove down to North Palm Beach on Thursday, the 22nd.  Wow.  The drivers were absolutely terrible.  Freaking awful.  So many people sitting in the fast lane going way under the speed limit, while everyone had to pass them in the SLOW lane.  And then, someone wasn't paying attention (and didn't seem to give a crap), and ran us onto the shoulder.  They were going extra slow in the passing lane, realized they needed to get over two lanes, and just did.  Without looking at who was in the lane.  And we were driving a boat of a rental car.  I can't figure out how they could've missed us.

We got to see Grandpa Gary in Ocala at Cracker Barrel.  Claire was a little shy, but eventually warmed up.  He has the Grandaddy of all RVs.  That thing is huge and fancy!  Claire got a Beanie Ball Bumblebee which she loved on the entire trip down to North Palm Beach. She loves editions to her stuffed animal collection!

We got to North Palm Beach and went out to dinner.  Claire was so darned exhausted that she was in her unreasonable state.  Nothing could please her, nothing was good enough.  So all during dinner, Bryce and I took turns going in and out of the restaurant, observing the fountain, the stars, the rocks, the Christmas lights.  She even loved the squishy fake grapes on the polls outside the restaurant. On reentering the restaurant, however, her obsession with Christmas trees ended up with an ornament tragedy. Apparently, nice trendy restaurants in North Palm use CRYSTAL freaking ornaments on their trees, all within little kid grasp.  So, a certain curious monkey touched a blue fishy ornament, and CRASH! Tinkle, Tinkle! Dun, dun, dun. The restaurant was awesome about it - I apologized, (I made) Claire apologize, but they were more worried that Claire didn't get cut by the glass.  Pretty cool.

Friday, Claire got to ride the carousel with Auntie Shana and Nana.  And then rode the Tot Train!  She loved it!  Of course, she had to wave to me every time the carousel went by my location.  It was precious.  And seriously, that was the coolest music I've ever heard from a Tot Train.  Nana saw a doggy boutique after we got done and bought herself a doggy stroller.  She received quite a bit of ribbing for that.  But we tried it out later, with Claire in her little umbrella stroller, and the doggies in their little stroller, and everyone was pretty happy.

We got to see Bryce's friend Andrew on the 24th, before the Christmas party at his mom's.  We went to the beach at MacArthur State Park.  Claire was so darned excited by it all.  We received an epic tantrum when we had to leave.  Part tiredness and part excitement fueled quite an embarrassing flip out on her part.  I didn't realize until I had walked past this Muslim family, but my bathing suit had slipped and I had flashed them.  Oi.  Well, when you have a toddler sobbing uncontrollably on your shoulder, some things are bound to be missed.

The Christmas party was strangely subdued this year. The pictures were done by the same people who did Claire's pictures a few weeks ago.  They looked awesome. Claire got a cute tea set from Bryce's Aunt's sister (Claire - she's been partial to my munchkin of the same name). Bryce made the filet mignon this year (with some help from Ed), and he did an amazing job.  Dinner was super late, though - 10 pm.  Claire went to bed right after. I think I did as well.

Christmas Day, Bryce, Claire, and I were up at 8:30 with his mom.  Nobody else rolled in until 10:30ish. We didn't open presents until 11:30.  That was rough trying to keep Claire entertained until everyone showed up. Santa and Nana got Claire all the Thomas the Tank Engine trains and sets she could ever want.  Auntie Shana got Claire a Twilight Turtle, which, at the moment, might beat out Thomas.  Every single night, she has to turn on the turtle and display the night sky on her ceiling and walls.  And when she wakes up in the middle of the night, the same thing.  She adores it.   Although, it's becoming a bit of an issue when she wakes up crying, saying, "My light up turtle! My light up turtle is broken!" Then we have to go down, turn it on, put her back to sleep. Does anyone know where they sell adapters to keep that thing on all night?

The flight back was totally not cool.  I'm done with American Airlines.  Totally done.  On the way down, the person announcing allowed families to board, which is crucial for us because we have a car seat to install.  It takes a bit of time with the tightening down, then getting Claire strapped in.  Well, on the way back, they didn't give us family boarding.  They announced First Class/Priority Access.  Then the chick just totally didn't pay attention to what the ticket checker person was doing.  He went ahead and scanned everyone and their brother in that walked up.  So all these families are waiting, and it gets down to just the families and ten other people when a lady pipes up, "Who is boarding now? Because I just saw 2 Group 2's board, and I thought we were doing First Class/Priority Access." The lady rushes over, confers with her ticket person, and then allows all the groups to board.  Awesome.  Thanks guys.  So helpful for all the families to have to wade through everyone because you guys are uncoordinated.  Then, we get on and get to Row 31 (2nd to the last row), and. we try to install our car seat.  I mention to the flight attendant standing a row back that we really need a seat belt extender to install the car seat properly.  He just kind of blinks his eyes at me and motions that he'll get it (and keeps standing their slumped over the last seat).  Claire is screaming because she can't get in her seat, I finally say, "Claire, we can't put you in until your seat is installed properly.  We have to have the extender.  I hear a jingle, and the guy is literally shaking an extender in my face when I look up.  WTF?  Shaking it at me like I'm cattle? Moo. Then, when we put the extender on, it won't install the seat without unlatching itself. So we have to have the seat extremely loosely installed because the seat belt extender is a POS. We put Claire in it (and I'm cursing audibly at this point), they push away from the gate, and then we sit for 30 minutes in the same spot, unmoving.  When we finally take off, our flight attendant back in our area sits in his jump seat for 90% of the flight, picking his nose and dozing.  The other flight attendants took care of the whole plane, but I guess he couldn't be bothered. I'm so done with American.  I've been noticing during the last several trips how awful their service has been becoming, but this takes the cake.  Shame on you all, American Airlines.

When we got home, my laptop had arrived.  Yay! So here I am, typing away at it.  Couldn't be happier to not be typing up a post on my phone.

Strep and Halloween

Goodness, it's been a little while and that shouldn't have happened. The Plague, AKA Strep, hit the house, and that took me out for awhile. I took B down with me. I'm awesome like that. C avoided it *somehow* and my mom who is visiting has shown no signs of the Good Ship Strepipop pulling up to the dock yet. So, back to normal life we return. C will be celebrating her third Halloween this year! First Halloween she was a kitty cat; second a butterfly. This year, she will be a ... Garden Fairy Princess! Yes, this is what happens when Mommy says, "That cat costume is cool," and Daddy takes one look at the selection and (almost) squeals, "That fairy costume is perfect for her!" Some things you have to let Daddy win. I'm sad to report that I'm getting my butt kicked in Words with Friends; actually, it's about 50/50. Some people are so competitive; I love to play to build words. So whether you win or lose against me, I'm always having fun. Lame, but true. I need a good recipe for caramel apples; I'm off to search!

Decluttering

So, I've taken on the challenge of organizing. It's called The 40 bag challenge, or in my case, the 21 Bag Challenge. You list every area of your house to declutter. Then, once a day, you complete a task, from that list by removing a bag of crap from that area and throwing it away. I've gotten rid of so much junk. I think that Bryce is a hoarder. Maybe I was in a past life as well, but within the last couple months I've come to my senses and can't stand the crap anymore.

So far, I've decluttered:

Master bath
Kitchen sink
Claire's bath
Claire's closet
Claire's drawers
Guest closet and crawlspace

These were serious tasks. I'm taking on the pantry and kitchen cabinets and drawers next. But I feel like a battle hardened warrior now. I can conquer all!

My take on the C Word

Cleaning.

What were you thinking I meant?

Let's be frank, no one wants to see our stuff. Even, our nearest and dearest. They will still love us, but we will forever be classified into the "slob" category.

Obviously, we go around tidying up before people come over for a reason. Yet, without fail, I go to someone's house and there is a pile of dirty laundry forgotten in a corner, or dirty dishes piled high in the sink. This is usually the problem of "it's been there so long I don't remember it." so your mind just glides right over the issue and doesn't see it anymore.

What you have to do is take a step back and view your place objectively.

What would you like to see when you walk in to a friend's house?

I'll admit I'm the queen of hiding things away. Like in the master bedroom. Shut the door - done. Rest of the place looks awesome. As long as this doesn't become a perpetual dumping ground, this works great. As in, you have to eventually fold that load of laundry.

Also, people make allowances for mess given extenuating circumstances, such as a new baby, painting, death in the family, etc. You aren't June Cleaver!

My point of all this, it just means you have to care. Sure, at the end of the day, I sometimes say, "I'll take care of this tomorrow." but it's not just an excuse, I (almost) always do. I'm tired and you're tired. You'll be stressed and annoyed but putting in the effort to make the house presentable not only to guests, but to YOU, will calm you and make your days go a whole lot smoother.

Pants, no Pants, and Curtains

This was a day of no pants and pants.

First, no pants. Claire decided, as usual, that we were going to have an epic battle to end all battles on the changing table. After the battle was fought To get a diaper on (Mommy 1, Claire 0), mommy decided it wasn't worth the fight to put on the pants. so Claire paraded around all morning with no pants, mischievously saying, "Go naked?" and me replying, "yes, Claire, partially naked." and wondering what we were going to do when she wanted to be naked in the wintertime.

And now, Pants! Claire goes down for a nap, and I decide to investigate a mysterious plastic bin under the bed. I open it and, gasp! My jeans from before Claire! Now that I lost the wait I fit in them again! I swore I thought I had given them away to charity back before I decided to do Jenny Craig, so this is an awesome score on my part. Yay Megan!

In completely unrelated news, we got the new curtains up. It is so much brighter in here! Im so happy with my decision. They are slightly more formal than I had planned, but I'm really happy with them, regardless.

Florida

So, having grown up in Florida, you'd think I'd remember just how miserable August is, but Chicago has me fooled. I always think, Gosh, it won't be so bad. Then we land, and I'm like, crap, what the heck was I thinking?!?!

August in Florida is ridiculous. You literally spend all your time scurrying from one air conditioned store to the next, and when you get in the car, you put the AC on full blast just to compensate for the misery.

So, here we are, considering what we're going to do if Hurricane Irene hits us Friday. I haven't had to think about this stuff in six years. My mom is all excited, "we've got two generators this time! We can air condition our bedroom!" Oh, the simple things in life that make us happy. Wait, doesn't that mean no AC for me and Claire at night? Yuck.

I am truly looking forward to getting back to my city which is in the 70's right now.

Two Year Olds Say the Darndest Things

So, I was thinking on what would be a good grand opening post to my blog. I thought of that show, "Kids Say the Darndest Things." (okay, so maybe I'm only 30, and I've only seen a fake clip of it used on Family Guy, but you get the idea) so here we go.

I have to constantly yell at my fat ass cat, Mandy to stop scratching the couch. I yell, "Mandy, Mandy," in my sternest teacher voice. Normally by then she's done scratching, but I feel as if I've accomplished something. Well, C has picked up the habit and starts yelling, "Mannee! Mannee!". Ooooooops. But 'Manneee' does stop. Heh.

I don't know why I taught her this, but I've paid for it in spades. So, every time she sees something she's excited about she says hi to it, like airplanes. "Hi airplane!" and then, "bye airplane! See you a morrow, airplane!" well, unfortunately, this extends to mommy going potty as well. We'll be at the mall, Nd mommy has to pee in a public restroom. "hi, potty!" mommy gets done, "bye bye PEE (emphasis on that)! See you a morrow PEE!" cue snickers from every stall in the bathroom.

And my all time favorite: clocks. C is obsessed with clocks. And I've been keeping an eye out for a nice clock for our kitchen. I'm in Target in the Home Decor section, and C starts in with, "Mama! Mama! COCKS! COCKS!" I had forgotten her propensity for dropping L's. I hurriedly say very loudly, so no one thinks I am raising a young porn star, "yes, sweetie, those are CLOCKS! Very good for noticing the CLOCKS!" oi.